Questions to ask a therapist, counselor, or psychologist in Montclair
/Questions to ask a therapist, counselor, or psychologist in Montclair
So, you found a few therapists in Montclair that seem nice enough. They all talk about having a consultation. They phrase it as an opportunity to get a feel for them before you decide to move forward. That’s great. Only issue is, what do you ask them?
Questions to ask a Therapist in Montclair
How long have you been practicing?
How long someone has been practicing isn’t always a determinant of their ability as a therapist. Some recent graduates are fantastic therapists. Some therapists with years of experience are burnt out and it shows in their work. However, this is always a good question. The sweet spot is at least a couple of years. If they have been practicing for a couple of years, it is very likely they have worked with a decent number of clients and have good experience.
What licenses and certifications do you have?
Some prospective clients really care about licenses and certification. Sometimes people believe that a particular license or certification is paramount in their work. When it comes to licenses, we want to make sure that the therapist is legally licensed to practice in New Jersey. For instance, I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker who is legally allowed to practice in New Jersey. However, when it comes to me making a referral for a loved one or friend, making sure the therapist is legally licensed is just the first step. I always focus more on fit. Is the therapist a good fit for the client? See more below on fit.
How much do you charge?
A pet peeve of mine is therapists disclosing what they charge up front. I really don’t like seeing therapists’ websites where they do not disclose their fee. Many therapists do this because they don’t want you to rule them out based on their fee before they can speak to you. This has a bit of a sleazy sales feel to it for me. Look on the therapist’s website for their fee or ask about it.
Describe your ideal client.
Not every therapist has an ideal client. But you want the one whose does. It seems like the majority of therapists do not have ideal clients. I am part of the minority that does. I love working with four types of clients; young adult college students, people living in quiet desperation, people in recovery from addiction, and couples. I work almost exclusively with these types of clients. In my free time I read and learn more about these populations. When I go for my hikes in the woods I think about them. When I present at conferences and train other therapists it is almost always on these clients. I am excited and invigorated from my sessions with these clients. You deserve a therapist who is chomping at the bit to work with you.
Is this therapist in Montclair a good fit?
I mentioned above that I would talk about fit. Based on my experience, fit is the most important factor for outcomes in therapy. If you end up with the wrong fit, it will severely limit your growth. However, if you end up with the right fit, the sky is the limit. Below are questions focused on fit.
What are your strengths and weaknesses as a therapist?
I always advise people to ask this question. If a therapist can’t answer that question then they probably aren’t the right fit for you. I am fantastic at establishing relationships with people and making them feel comfortable. Within the first few sessions they are opening up about things which seemed to feel impossible to discuss. I am great at transitioning from seriousness to humor. One of my guiding principles as a therapist is that we always take our work seriously but are not alway serious about how we do. Laughing and making progress are not mutually exclusive. My stance on humor is also one of my limitations. If prospective clients are looking for a very serious and stoic therapist I am absolutely the wrong therapist for them. Some prospective clients want a therapist who uses a formalized approach like cognitive behavioral therapy. Again, for those clients I am absolutely the wrong fit.
Have you been in therapy yourself?
This is always an interesting question. If it is important to you, ask it. It’s up to the therapist to disclose their own experience if they want. Many therapists will inquire about where is that question coming from. That is what they are taught in graduate school and supervision. When I get that question I usually figure that clients are really asking if I have personal experience (i.e. will I “really” understand them). Instead of digging into where that question comes from, I just give them the truth. I’ve been in therapy for a number of years and it’s one of the reasons I chose this profession. I know what it’s like to be the other person and I know the impact that a great therapist can have. I start every Monday morning with my own therapy session because life has challenges and I want to see how much I can grow.
How often would you see me and for how long?
This question is a weed-out test for me. If a therapist says just a couple of sessions move on. I move fast with my clients but it still takes time. I think that anything worth having is worth working for. I believe that you get out of therapy what you put into it. Sometimes prospective clients ask about seeing me every other week. I advise them that I personally don’t find that to be aligned with my approach. Too much time passes in between sessions that way. How long I see clients is entirely dependent on what’s going on in their lives. The majority of my clients came for a particular challenge and we made progress towards it. Along the way though they really started to see the growth and we are now pushing further with our work.
What is a typical session like? How long are the sessions?
Figuring out what a typical session looks like can help you determine if the therapist is the right fit for you. I really like to have fun in sessions. Remember, a key belief of mine is that we can have a good time and still make great progress. Some of my clients don’t like sitting in front of screens or being indoors. I heard that from them and now we go for hikes instead. I call it walk and talk therapy. I used to do hour long sessions. Then I realized that the sessions seemed to drag a bit. Now I do 45 minute sessions. This forces us to get right into the work. The key for you is to think about what you would feel most comfortable with. Maybe you want a stoic therapist. Or maybe you want phone sessions. Once you identify what you want, make sure the therapist offers that. If not you are settling for the wrong fit.
Finding a therapist or counselor in Montclair
I hope these questions help you find the right therapist in Montclair. If you are still feeling lost, feel free to call me at (973)-978-5502 for a free 15-minute phone consultation. I might not be the right fit for you, but I’d be happy to hear about what’s going on and I can help direct you to the right person. If you are looking for help with feeling anxiety, depression, or addiction, you can read more about how I can help.
